THE DANGERS OF ASSUMING YOU KNOW OTHERS’ FEELINGS BASED ON YOUR OWN EXPERIENCES
When your heart is not healed from your own soul wounds of your past you will often project your own personal experiences on others situations assuming you know exactly what they are feeling. The truth is that your own experiences are not exactly the same as other people. So you will often not have the compassion of Christ for others’ situations yet believe you are better at handling what they are going through with a heart posture that you are superior to them due to the pride still within you.
While many of our personal experiences can have similarities to others it is faulty to assume you know exactly what others are enduring because it can cause incorrect assumptions and advice and wound those you are giving counsel to. If you have had some similar experiences it is best to indicate that you don’t know exactly what the other person is feeling and to have compassion for what they are experiencing instead of dismissing their pain or telling them to just get over it like you did.
Conversely it is best not to give any advice when you have never walked through similar experiences. Many will give advice that is simply bad due to not having any experience in the area of being emotionally abused in marriages, hurt by your parents and parenting wounded children. If your heart’s posture is filled with pride and superiority then you will usually end up causing hurt to those you give advice to. Also if you have any jealousy towards others you will ultimately hurt them. So check your heart and always ask the Holy Spirit and look in the mirror at your own motives of your heart first before advising others.
Proverbs 16:2 states, “All a person’s ways seem right in his own opinion, but the Lord evaluates the motives” emphasizing that while humans focus on actions, God judges the intentions of the heart. Proverbs teaches that motives must be aligned with God, as He “weighs the spirits” behind our actions, often identifying pride as a hidden driver.
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