HONORING YOUR PARENTS NEVER MEANS TOLERATING THEIR ABUSE OR RECONCILING

There are so many adults who have been controlled, manipulated and abused by a parent when they were children and then it continues on throughout their entire lives until their parent dies – many whose parents go to church every week and would say they are Christians and scripture abuse them that you must “honor and obey” them – but have no godly fruit and a whole lot of pride, control, emotional abuse, evil and shame.

Many have been hurt and emotionally abused and worse by a parent who never was healed from their own childhood wounds. So as a hurt child grows into an adult the enemy wants us to believe we should continue to allow an abusive parent to hurt us with their words under the scripture of “honoring their parent.” We must understand that honoring a parent does not mean to tolerate them emotionally abusing us when we are an adult, forever.

What does the Bible say?

Ephesians 6:1-4 NKJV

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”

So when you are 21 years old or older are you still a child? No you are now an adult. So what if your parent doesn’t walk in any fruit of the spirit. No love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness or self control. What if they blame you, shame you, ridicule, mock, insult, are selfish, jealous, and prideful and put you down everytime they talk to you? Their demons want to inflict deep hurt into you so you can’t forgive them and then you will hear their same demons torment you trying to get you to hurt your own children and pass it down to the next generation.

So what should you do? Always forgive your parents from your heart – you don’t need to go to them and say it to their face. Ask Jesus to show you how they got hurt – usually from their parent or sexual violations. Then give Jesus all the pain you felt from them (rejection, control, unworthy, anger, etc) to Jesus to heal you and then command all demons to be gone from your soul. Then put up healthy boundaries between you are your parents. You may need to block them completely from having any contact with you. Sometimes honoring simply means not exposing their evil publicly.

Matt 10:34-39 Jesus said a man’s enemies will be those of his own household. His father, mother, etc.

Matthew 10:37 “He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me.”